Symptoms of “Run Off At The Mouth” disease are usually witnessed in narcissistic TV personalities with massive audiences.  They include  pretending to be ignorant about a cultural group or its characteristics and making derogatory statements about them on national TV, in front of massive audiences.  They are not fully conscious and will use innocent people in their fury to damage anyone interfering with their agenda or their platform.  Sometimes there is a noticeable slip of the tongue, or an “accident” on their part, but when they hear applause for their remarks, they are again restored to their perceived highest sense of duty, and they see no need to backtrack or apologize.  These symptoms are visible to outsiders, but the victims of this disease never know they are afflicted with it.

The View.  A daytime talk show with half a dozen hosts and a daily guest celebrity or two.  This likeable but sometimes caustic group decided recently that they had already decided NOT to talk about a past Vice President’s recent alleged sexual advances toward a massage therapist in his hotel, but they did anyway (supposedly he was drunk and massage therapists know better than to work on someone who is drunk, but that’s for another post, another time).  They proceeded to dive headlong into discussion about a 3 hour massage (another allegation which was most likely a misquote because although the therapist might have put in a total of 3 hours including transportation and set up, break down, payment, etc., there’s no way she was doing a 3 hour massage on a drunk man — please).  Their comments quickly turned on massage therapists because after all, Mr. Morning Politico (not his real name), alluding to his mother’s wise comment that “nothing good happens after midnight”, experienced that wisdom to serve as an umbrella over anyone he might suspect being up to no good.  His comment?  ”Nothing good happens after one hour of massage”.

Applause from the audience.

Then, Ms. Regular (also not her real name), buddies with Mr. Politico, no doubt, swore she was going to get into trouble by saying what she had to say, but she said it anyway . . . described how her prenatal hormonally charged emotions got the best of her after she saw the attractive massage therapist she hired to come to her home for her husband’s birthday and how “she was playing music”, “and whatever”. Her comment?  ”massage is one push away from weird”.

More applause – very enthusiastic applause.

Enter Massage Therapists.  All up in arms about the way many media pundits and a web designer with big bucks enough to buy advertising on Superbowl day portray us (yes, in case you haven’t guessed, I’m a massage therapist too), lots of hoopla stirred into Facebook posts, Tweets, and blogs across the country and cyberspace.  The question?  How can we continue to work so hard to provide pain relief to our knowledgeable clients – those who actually PAY us to PROVIDE THERAPY for them, when we meet this kind of popular opinion being so “innocently” doled out almost on a daily basis?

Ok, I used “innocently” because this is how some people are really seeing these derogatory events.  The excuse is “we have to educate the public, we have to educate the public, we have to educate the public . . “.

Good.  I’m all for it.  Just don’t ask me to create more brochures, more pamphlets, flyers, cards, articles, books, magazines, etc. “educating” the public and mailing, faxing, emailing, posting . . . whew, I’m already exhausted just thinking about the task of “educating the public”.  I do that by administering the best therapeutic massage I trained for, spent lots of money learning, am licensed for, insured for, and paid for. There is plenty of information for the getting if people want it, and I would suggest that anyone who cares about their reputation as a talk show host would care enough to research the subjects they dole out opinions on BEFORE they do their part to “educate the public”.  After all, they have the platform to reach millions of viewers.  They could do us a lot of good.  Most of us work for a living and many, many of us have our own businesses.

Personally, just as an aside, I think the public is not so dumb.  Ok, maybe in the case of a few pundits out to hurt someone’s good name, or because they want to appeal to a certain religious demographic watching their show . . . . perhaps.

This is where Sex in the City comes into my little hypothetical analogy . . and I’m not talking about the HBO series.  I’m talking about sex as in paid for as a service. We all know where sex takes place and its in the city as much as it is in the country, ok?  Since it mostly happens behind closed doors, and since anybody that enters a hotel room is behind a closed door, and any activity that goes on behind these closed doors is subject to speculation, should massage therapists be the only ones who are suspect of prostitution?  Why don’t we talk about hotel staff who clean our rooms, janitorial staff, room service staff, etc.?  What about those celebrities who need their entourage of hair stylists, make-up artists, seamstresses, managers, agents, nannies, doctors, nurses, PR assistants, blah, blah, blah?  What about these people?  Are they just “one push from weird”?  That’s just ridiculous.

I’m just going to go ahead and push myself (weirdly) out on the edge of that limb I’m on and say that touch in massage is sometimes equated with sex in the city, even after 30 years of “educating the public” about the benefits of massage therapy and the rise of its useage.  This lack of education is also being attributed to the baby boomers and education efforts of some supportive organizations in place for massage therapists.

Wait, I did say “lack” of education right?  Well, I read that currently, half the American population had already had a massage at one time or another, and that “education efforts and baby boomers” were responsible for the uprise in popularity of massage therapy.  Yet, we still have national TV talk show hosts talking about it as though it were only about sex. . . and we’re still attempting to “educate” the public about massage therapy.

Perhaps the ignorance of the public is perpetuated by derogatory speculation of the profession.  Perhaps these sophisticated, well dressed and coifed TV personalities don’t do research.  So how would they know of the education, licensing and insurance requirements massage therapists must meet?.  If they had research assistants they should know that most states now require at least 500 hours of massage related education courses to include anatomy, physiology, pharmacology, pathology, technique, ethics, business, and YES, boundaries and safety measures.  There are a few states that are still lagging behind in setting higher standards for massage therapy, but the pressure is on them to get with the program.  In addition to lagging behind in legislation, some Health Departments of certain states have no staff to govern massage establishments and call them on the carpet for unethical activity.  In the state of Texas, for instance, it is against the law for a sex oriented business to use the term “massage” in their business name or advertisements.

So while Sex in the City continues to take place all the time, it has less place in the massage therapy business than most people think, or, I should say, most UNEDUCATED people.  Massage therapy, while  a paid for service in the interest of providing an enhancement for health, is not about or for entertainment.

That is My View.

Mothers Are Divine

Mothers are a divine element in the world

Our bodies cannot be owned or borrowed

by those who would control our gift of childbearing,

though they may try -

Our work is too exclusive, our pain and sorrow too deep,

and our recompense is not always equal to our strife.

Blood, Sweat, and Tears -

only 3 small words of description appointed to our roles

but they speak loudly.

Loving a Mom

and Hating a Mom is natural, -

poignant at times, always visceral, daunting in magnitude

and Being a Mom

is many times thankless, confusing,

frightening, frustrating, challenging -

a journey without a map,

a project without blueprint.

Being a Mom

and Knowing a Mom is a camaraderie,

an understanding of the plight,

while Being a Mom

and Teaching a Mom

is tricky,

a wobbly plankwalk, precarious and obtuse,

- sometimes humbling,

sometimes misunderstood,

sometimes miraculous.

Losing a Mom

and Mourning a Mom

is like skating on ice for the first time

not much fun -

a cold, slippery falling down hard on your ass -

inflammatory anger and acid tears

a fight with the dark for courage

Sharing a Mom

is unthinkable

- “no, she belongs only to me.  Stay away, she’s mine.”

Appreciating a Mom

is easy

and crazy difficult

- its acknowledgement for her humanity,

for her vulnerability,

its recognition for her strength and courage,

for her selflessness and love.

Its a compassion for her frailties,

a following of her readiness to forgive,

an allowance of her need to be forgiven -

Its an embracing of her soft body, her sighs and steadfastness,

her breast and her hips, her arms and her song.

A Mom is Golden,

profoundly earthy and powerful

- she sees only perfection in the smile of her baby,

and greatness in her child’s scrawly handwriting,

- she dies quietly with each child’s venture out the door to adulthood,

and alone hears the heart sing with new grandchild dreams.

A Mother is simply

a divine element in the world.

Her body cannot be owned or borrowed

by those who would control the gift of bearing the child,

- though they may try.

Her work is too consuming,

her pain and sorrow too real,

and her love is always greater than her strife.

Blood, Sweat, and Tears

while 3 very raw words of description appointed to her role,

they are gifted freely.

To all the Mothers in my life, and those to come, I salute you, – Everyday.

Deborah E. Herriage, May 2010

My first inclination was to attempt to remove any confusion for you and give you the opportunity to let out a Big Sigh.  I work hard to streamline as many of the processes involved in this type of therapy as possible, so that you are left with simply showing up and getting a great massage.  Whether you are in pain and need some release of some muscle, or you need a way to let down and relax, I am here for you.  If you are injured and you need massage to help heal your injury, let me help you get there.

If  you have had massage as therapy before, I would love to hear about your experiences, – what you like and don’t like, or even what you’d like to see happen in our industry, – generally anything you’d like me to know, as someone who is not only a business person interested in providing you with the best possible service, but someone who is also a massage therapist who cares about you as an individual, with needs that are unique to you.

My business is based on the belief that our customers’ needs are of the utmost importance.  I am  committed to meeting those needs.

I welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver you the best service in the industry.

With sincerest regards,

Deborah Herriage, LMT, RYT

Yoga is a wonderfully profound discipline for the body and mind and I don’t want to discourage anyone from trying yoga – but in all the years I’ve practiced it and from my experience in teaching it, I’ve developed a small group of ideas I’d like for new yoga students to know before they go to their first classes.

Not wanting to portray myself as the yoga police,  let me just point out that these are all suggestions of course, but they can make a difference in how successful someone’s first experiences in yoga will be – in fact, you might even appear to be less of an amateur.

All yoga classes are not created equal. Neither are all students, nor all teachers for that matter – so,  I lovingly wish for all would-be yogis to know the following:

1.  Please go only to classes where the yoga teacher is teaching the breath (pranayama) during asana practice. If you are not learning how to utilize your breath for optimal stretching and cardiovascular health while holding poses, you’re not doing yoga, you’re only posing.

2.  Please let go of your competitive urge. If you are hoping to show others what you can do, or if you’re trying to do what someone else can do, your focus is being scattered to the winds and you are not doing yoga.

3.  Please arrive on time, not 10 minutes late, not even 5 minutes late.  Things happen of course, so once in a great while a tardy student can come in to class and take a few minutes to do some breathing and then proceed with asana along with the rest of the class, without falling too far behind.  In 10 short minutes though, the teacher has already led the class through a breathing exercise and into some easy introductory stretches that are important in the progression of the instruction, so someone walking in at that point is most definitely missing something as well as interrupting the flow.  This is not yoga.

3.  Please be willing to do 10 slow, deliberate poses and be willing to hold them for 30 seconds or longer, and trust that you will build strength, flexibility, and cardiovascular fitness in a relatively short amount of time. You will not be cheated. If you feel you must quickly fit 30 poses into an hour, be sore for several days afterwards, and risk injury by not resting, you are not doing yoga, and you really need an aerobics class instead.

4.  Please don’t go to a yoga class after you’ve just run 6 miles, or after you’ve just eaten dinner and had a few drinks.  Yoga is best practiced on an empty stomach and if you haven’t eaten in a few hours, maybe just a piece of fruit will get you through class, but too much food in the stomach during class is going to make you feel queasy.  The exertion you will need during a yoga class will also require that you have significant carbohydrate stores, so if you have run them all out, you’re going to be weak during class.   The nix of alcohol is . . well, self-explanatory.  Again, this is not yoga.

5.  Remember that yoga is about stretching for flexibility, strengthening and lengthening muscles for tone, and breathing for relaxation and stress management.  Oh, and throw in some good dosages of contemplation and self inquiry for good measure.   Anything else might look like, but probably isn’t, yoga.

6.  Please understand that socks on your feet during yoga class interfere with the traction needed to ground you to the earth while your body might be in a precarious position and that your cold feet will warm up with the rest of your body if you are breathing properly. Yoga is difficult and produces heat quickly. If you are wearing restricting clothing and socks, you are not doing yoga.

7.  Please also know that “Namaste” does not make you Hindi and is not anti-Christian, but that it is a greeting which means, “The light in me recognizes and honors the light in you”. You are not obligated to say namaste to anyone but if you deny yoga tradition, you are not doing yoga.

8.  Please remain in Savasana (the relaxation portion, – Corpse Pose) at the end of the class until class is dismissed. Savasana is a very important part of the body’s process to assimilate information to the nervous system and gives the spine a chance to regain its normal composition again before you go out into the world after just having twisted it, bent it forward, backward, sideways, etc. This is honoring the body and practicing mindful relaxation, an integral part of yoga. Need to leave early? Tell your teacher before class that you’ll quit a few minutes early and get into Savasana so you have enough relaxation time before you run out the door. If you’re jumping up as soon as you get down without enough relaxation before the end of class, you are not doing yoga.

9.  Please know that yoga is an ancient tradition and it is a sophisticated system to create optimal wellness in both the mind and the body. They cannot be separated and rightly so. Give your mind over to your body, and your body will free your mind.

Peace and Namaste’ for now . . .

Deborah

Who are the true Artists of this time?  Feel free to post your thoughts.

Maybe YOU are an Artist?

It was my own personal news column.  My thoughts in writing, – on the internet – and I didn’t care.

No one read these of course, except for my loyal/friend/partner in opinion crimes, Steve Maggi.  He’d trade comments with me, and then we’d go on to something newer.  We complained about the state of the world in general, — a lot.

Blogging was relatively underground in those days, and I wasn’t aware that basically, that was what I was engaging in.  Now, here I am, using WordPress instead of my own website, which I’ve relegated to my business, as it should be.

My opinions have mellowed a lot too.  My responses to the latest news these days resemble something between those that an “old codger” might have, (the “old codger” term being one my son Matt is fond of using as a way to tease me), or, one that is slightly more like one from an “enlightened being, non-attached to results” type.

So, if you’re reading this, welcome to my blog.  “Just So You Know”, it is going to get interesting here. . .

Considering the insane statistics that testify to the numbers of books published today, by way of the traditional publishing houses, e-books, and self-publishing efforts, we might be under some kind of literary population explosion (or renaissance) . . . or maybe, its simply that baby-boomers are hitting the zenith of their years and finally feel they’d better try to leave their wisdom behind in some fashion.  No doubt there is a lot to say to the current and future generations as speedy changes in our political, economic, and cultural systems leave all our heads spinning.  Disregarding the statistics of books, it doesn’t need to be said that there’s so many books and not enough time to read them.

In a post on the New Yorker website, “Books that Die a Natural Death”, Julia Welsenthal quotes Virgina Woolf’s comments to her husband, on the number of books written and published:

“Books ought to be so cheap that we can throw them away if we do not like them, or give them away if we do. Moreover, it is absurd to print every book as if it were fated to last a hundred years. The life of the average book is perhaps three months. Why not face this fact? Why not print the first edition on some perishable material which would crumble to a little heap of perfectly clean dust in about six months time? If a second edition were needed, this could be printed on good paper and well bound. Thus by far the greater number of books would die a natural death in three months or so. No space would be wasted and no dirt would be collected.”

Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/books/2009/05/books-that-die-a-natural-death.html#ixzz0dSk9eTAO

Being the owner of too many books myself, I find myself lazily, but with renewed interest, exploring books from the 1950s and ’60s, delving into subjects of consciousness raising experiments, civil unrest, foreign customs, and popular culture, looking for what was being said during those times and how they might apply or not, in our present day.  So, I can’t agree completely with Virginia Woolf’s assessment of three months of life.

It seems to me that there is a significant contrast between how books were “born” after the invention of the printing press as opposed to how it happens today.  While not claiming to be a dynamic critical thinker (in fact, I’m not sure that thinking is what  happens in my head at all, much of the time), I’m pretty good at imagining what might have been, what could be, and what probably is, even if its not obvious.  Is this a task worth pursuing?  Maybe.  Food for thought?  Definitely.

I like to ask myself, whenever I read a book, “what seed existed for this story” and “where is this book in the stages of its life”?  No point in asking myself how I would have written it, of course.  Writers have their own blood, sweat, and tears to explain how they wrote it, if explanation is even an issue.  Readers, on the other hand, bring all their expectations, their beliefs, their past and present conditioning into the mix, with every word they read.  The final pages bring to a close the participation of said reader, and it is then they determine their impression about its quality and what they read.  They may even make a summation or write a review somewhere on Amazon or on the author’s blog.  Can these reviews determine the fate of the book then?

Looking back on the “seed, gestation, nurturing . . ” game plan, is it so surprising that some books just don’t “get born” and at what stage is that determination really made?